A couple of years ago, I was at a retail outlet and couldn’t help but overhear a conversation between a customer and the customer service representative at the counter. The customer was upset about a purchase, and his tone and frustration escalated to the point that he started name-calling and making personal threats toward the representative.
He yelled and cursed vehemently.
The customer service representative remained calm and empathetic to try to de-escalate the situation. Of course, she had training in these types of situations.
But could there have been something deeper going on? Why did the customer lose control of his emotions whereas the customer service representative did not?
A Breakdown of What Emotions Are
In his book “Master Your Emotions,” Thibaut Meurisse explains that most emotions are based on a personal story and perception of the world.
For example, my current story is the result of an identification with ideas, things, or people. If my identification is intense enough, I will experience negative emotions in life. A negative emotion, like defensiveness, could come from life not meeting my expectations or someone challenging my beliefs.
The interpretation of thoughts and experiences leads to emotions. We decide how to interpret our experiences and how closely we identify with our emotions.
Emotions are like magnets, and they will attract thoughts on the same wavelength. This is why it’s easy to spiral into a depressive state if we allow ourselves.
Emotions feed off of our thoughts and vice versa.
If you want to take control of your emotions, the first step is knowing how you feel.
An excellent place to start is recording emotions in a journal. This will allow you to look at the triggers and discover patterns.
It’s important to understand that emotions are not permanent, and they will pass as long as you do not strongly identify with them.
It isn’t about suppressing emotions but letting them be and letting them pass.
Changing emotions can be done by:
- Sleeping better
- Using different body language and body posture
Occasionally, changing your environment may be necessary to help you change your emotions.
Using Emotions As A Guide For Growth
Thibaut Meurisse explains many ways to use our emotions for growth. For example, stress can be a signal that something needs to be changed in your life. If a job is causing you stress, moving on to a different profession can help you grow in unimaginable ways.
Become self-aware, curious, appreciative, and accountable, and you’ll be able to transform your life.
By using self-awareness as a guide, you can objectively observe your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors for your personal growth.
“Master Your Emotions” is an excellent tool for navigating not only our own lives but also our interactions with others. With a full understanding of how our emotions can easily control our lives, we can be more empathetic towards others. It takes discipline to remain self-aware and conscious in the present moment. I believe we are all capable of this discipline, though.
I would love to hear what others think; leave a comment below!
I hope this book of the week review has provided some value to you. As always, thanks for reading!
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